Doug

You Need This In Your Life
You Need This In Your Life

Remember when you were a kid and you practiced kissing by making out with a pillow?  Me neither.  But I heard other kids at school talk about it and I always thought “That’s weird.  Why would they do that?  I mean, a pillow doesn’t even have a mouth…”

Well, for those other kids who shall remain nameless mostly because they were me I’ve tried to expunge them from my memory, there’s this…

practice-kissing-pillow-3

 

Yep.  That’s exactly what it looks like.  A pillow with a  nose and mouth sewed on to it.  So, you know, you can practice making out and it will actually make sense because there’s a mouth on it.  This is a DIY project that should be on your to do list this weekend.  You’ll need some thread, pillow stuffing, a sewing machine, the mouth and nose from a CPR dummy, and absolutely no contact with the opposite sex.  (There’s a bit more to it.  You can get full instructions HERE.)

If I would have been on my game, I would have had this to you in time for Valentine’s Day.  But hey, there’s another Friday night coming up.  If you’re not doing anything, you could throw this little guy together.

(Of course, now that I think about it, if you’ve got a CPR dummy, you could just make out with that.  I mean, why disfigure it just to put the mouth parts on a pillow?  You can’t dress up the pillow for a fancy dinner party can you?  You can’t dance with the pillow… well, I guess you can, but dancing around your apartment/house with a pillow witha mouth sewed on it seems a bit silly, don’t ya think?  I’m not even sure why you have a CPR dummy in the first place.  Wait…. Wait…  You’ve been making out with it already haven’t you?  You have!  You sly boots!  Look at you.  And here when you said you had plans last weekend I thought you were just duckin’ me.  Well play friend.  Well played.)

So get to makin’ with the crafty.  Enjoy your new throw pillows.  (I’m going to leave that one there.  You can fill in the blanks with your own jokes.  You’re welcome.)

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